Warnings from my mom

My Mom was the queen of warnings…. she really believed my brother and I would not survive past childhood.  And it would be all her fault for not warning us of all the dangers.  Here are just a few of the warnings I remember.

If you cross your eyes, they will stay that way and there is nothing you can do!

Tie your shoes or you will trip and break your leg or even kill yourself.

When I started dating… she said, “boys only want one thing.”  (she neglected to tell me what that thing was)

If you wrinkle your forehead it will stay wrinkled (that eventually came true).

Stop at all railroad crossings.

Always wear a headscarf  or a hat or you will catch a cold.

Don’t lean on the screened window or the screen on the porch door.

Clean your plate,  kids are starving and someday you will wish you had that food!

Keep your legs together.

Be careful.

Sit up straight or you will end up all hunched over.

Just because your friend  (insert name) does it doesn’t mean its ok.

Would you jump off the bridge if everyone else did?

Don’t marry a farmer.

Pick that up off the floor.  Babies can choke!

Get that cat out of here, it will suck the life out of babies.

Stay away from those window blinds, you can hang yourself on the cords.

Don’t pick your nose.

Stay out of the haymow… you will fall through a crack and kill yourself.

Don’t crack your knuckles or your hands will be huge!

Don’t lie to me because I will always find out!

I know I used to roll my eyes when I heard these warnings over and over.  But my mother was a success.  Both my brother and I survived our childhood.

What warnings did your mother give to you?