The Beatles were wrong.
There I’ve said it even though I never thought I would disagree with those 4 adorable boys from the 60’s.
What I have learned from the past (almost) 42 years of marriage is….. it takes more than LOVE.
Love is pretty darn important if you want a relationship to last at least 42 years. But it takes more than that.
If I had to choose one thing that would assist you in any relationship, I would choose Acceptance.
It’s easy to accept someone in the early stages of a relationship. You are discovering each other, you are emotional, passionate, perhaps infatuated and you love almost everything about your partner. Once you make a commitment to that person, things always/sometimes change. The more you spend time with that person, the more you get to know them, and undoubtedly there will be things that you really aren’t crazy about. Like how that person never scoots up to the dinner table and always has a pile of crumbs and spilled food all over the floor under his seat.
You just have to learn to accept things like that.
No one is perfect. There are things I do that drive my husband crazy (although I can’t really think of any at the moment) and there are things he does that drive me crazy. Any relationship has that whether it be couples, children, grandchildren, coworkers, or friends. Accepting people for their strengths and their crazinesses is necessary to maintain that relationship. There is no secret formula for relationships. But accepting others for who they are is an important part.
Just think what an awesome world it would be if we could all just accept each other.
http://everydaygurus.com/2013/05/28/monthly-peace-challenge-peace-at-home/
Retired Ruth 
Acceptance is so much part of loving unconditionally. Acceptance is letting our own expectations of someone or something take a back seat. Acceptance is kindness at work.
What a beautiful post Ruth, and you know I love your music choice.
How wonderfully appropriate, ~
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I completely agree with this. One of the things I’m learning as I’m getting older (53 now thank God), is to accept others, accept myself and accept the reality. Of course we want to “improve” things and especially ourselves, but it’s useless to try to change others (criticize). This theme is seen often with mothers-in-law and daughters-in-law. MIL’s are often critiquing their DILs or their sons in law. Isn’t it futile? Doesn’t it ruin relationships?
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It sure does! Accepting yourself is the first step. You got it girl!
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Great advice! I walked down the aisle to All you Need is Love, but I’m learning as I begin year four of marriage that it does take a bit more…;)
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It would be awesome, Ruth. people are so critical and impatient nowadays.
I have a husband who barely has a crinkle in his napkin after a meal, while mine is crumbled beyond recognition and food is probably dripped on my shirt. He’s so “dress-right-dress” about everything, he’s had to employ a lot of acceptance with me. 😉
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Let’s trade for a meal and see how we deal with our opposite spouses! LOL
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Sounds like you’ve hit a homerun with the line about not scooting up to the dinner table. My son does this at age 6 and it drives me crazy. Like you said, acceptance is an important part of all relationships. Congrats on 42 years. Here’s to accepting EVERYONE’S craziness and strengths. Thank you for this wise and hilarious post for peace. {{{hugs}}} Kozo
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Well, mom… now is the time to break the habit! (good luck) maybe my husbands mother just accepted him as he was and passed on the problem to me! LOL
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Yeah! I have said it for years … love is never enough. When it comes to a relationship, any relationship, you have to accept the whole package. And you have to accept it ALL the time.
blessings ~ maxi
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Yep! But you don’t have to like it! LOL
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So you have a crumby husband, too? I have told him for years I could go in a restaraunt and find the place where he was sitting. ugh
I love that quote! Wish I had used that in my post! Thanks.
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I actually called my neighbor and read him the last 3 sentences–we’re just neighbors/friends, but we’ve been working on our relationship for 5 years–and seeing progress on acceptance and appreciation of our strengths and craziness. Yay!! God bless you for 42 years of marriage–holy moly! Love, sis Caddo
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Yes, 42 years sometimes makes me scratch my head and think… realy?
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“Like how that person never scoots up to the dinner table and always has a pile of crumbs and spilled food all over the floor under his seat.” OMG … do you have a camera is my kitchen?!?!?!? 🙂
Accepting another person’s idiosyncrasies is tough but I’ve learned (for the most part, anyway) to follow this advice (from Dr. Wayne Dyer): “Never underestimate your power to change yourself; never overestimate your power to change others.”
Margo
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